Yikes! I am now a person with a disability requesting an accommodation

Diversity is intersectional; each one of us is a unique combination of all the attributes that form our diverse selves. Some of our attributes give us privilege and power in our society since it is an attribute that is part of the majority population and/or highly desired, and some of our attributes may marginalize us. For example, being an able-bodied white male born in this country provides me some form of privilege. Being an out gay man does provide a degree of marginalization since LGBTQ+ people are still often looked down upon and even demonized by segments of our population. Being a senior citizen (I turn 70 next year) is a mixed bag – in some places age is respected and valued, and in others discounted.

I have always been in great health, fully mobile and able-bodied with no disabilities. This makes is far easier to navigate daily life. I did live for seven weeks with a fractured hip and crutches, so that was a very short-term disability. I got a handicap parking placard and received great assistance when traveling through airports.

Being able-bodied and never needing to “swallow my pride” and request an accommodation has been a source of pride in a sense. But now something has changed and I needed to ask for an accommodation, and now I realize like many others, anyone can have a disability and it is fine to ask for an accommodation.

Here is my story.

I am a competitive adult figure skater, and one of the categories I complete in is called “emotional showcase.” The idea is to skate a program that evokes a wide range of emotions. A new rule is that you should display emotion through body movement and facial expression without lip syncing. At the 2024 US Adult Nationals, I was given the huge penalty of being awarded with the lowest possible score for my program for lip syncing. Because of bad allergies and sinus issues, I do need to open and close my mouth to breath which could look like lip syncing, but admittedly, I did mouth 3 words (“you and me”) within the program.

I actually won my first US Adult Nationals gold medal in 2022 for my emotional program before the new lip synching rule was effect. Link to my gold medal program.

After this virtual disqualification, I practiced my emotional program without mouthing a single word. But it my next competition, I was penalized again! One judge explained that I was opening and closing my mouth (to breathe) but it looked like I may have been lip syncing, so they penalized me. She was a very helpful judge, so I asked her what I could do. I even suggested wearing a mask, but she said judges want to see my full facial expression. She then told me about the US Figure Skating Adaptive Skating Committee and that I may be able to apply for an accommodation through them under the mandates of federal disability legislation.

I submitted my accommodation request along with documentation from my allergist. And now I have received the accommodation that I can share with competition referees, that when they see me opening and closing my mouth to breath during an emotional showcase program, that they will not assume I am lip synching and penalize me.

Two learning points for all of us:

1. We should not be ashamed or hesitate to ask for an accommodation when warranted.

2. We should not look down on others for needing an accommodation, nor assume they are 100% healthy and able-bodied when they may have an invisible disability.

Diversity of Views and Approaches Delivers Results – A Figure Skating Coaching Example

Both my coaches presenting me their wonderful gift – my own US Figure Skating jacket at a recent competition.

Many of you know that I am a diversity, equity and inclusion consultant and trainer, and also an avid figure skating fan and competitive adult figure skater myself. Over the years I have written several blogs connecting my work with my love for skating and the ties between diversity and figure skating.

In a recent discussion with one of my coaches, she remarked that she is very pleased that I have two primary coaches instead of just one, and that when I travel the country, I try to arrange a lesson or two with a coach at that location.

In terms of having two coaches, they each focus on different aspects of my skating. I started my skating journey with Paula McKinley eight years ago, and she led me through basic skills including ice dance, and she also loves to choreograph new programs. Then four years ago I began working with Robin Harger-Harger, who also loves choreography, improving my jumping and spinning technique, and working with props for showcase events.

With my first coach Paula McKinley following one of my first competitions

My two coaches are excellent with collaborating with each other; they talk every other week or so to compare notes on what they are currently working with me on. They also often see things going on with the programs that the other may miss, and because of these two sets of eyes and expertise, my skating is stronger.

Then when I travel or attend skating camps, I can work with a variety of other coaches. Robin recent remarked that “sometimes different coaches can express or explain things in different ways and you can learn something from each one.” That is so true. I find that as I work with various coaches, I pick up a new tip or technique that further helps my skating.

My Coach Robin Harger-Quigley with two of her US Adult Nationals medalists – Rebecca Martin and myself!


And this lesson from figure skating ports to the corporate and organizational world. Diverse teams with people with different life experiences, different lenses and different ways of thinking working together can arrive at better products, services and solutions to problems. Instead of being frightened of or threatened by the increasing diversity in our country and our workplaces, we should embrace it as it leads to the best results.

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Check out my dynamic 11-minute on-stage story of my adult figure skating journey at Durham, NC’s “The Monti” Storytelling event.

Check out my figure skating page for my upcoming competition schedule, links to videos, additional blogs and more!