Monthly Archives: December 2024

My final blog, and the five things I’ll be doing next

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I have had a fulfilling run as a DEIB consultant and trainer

This blog has many links – please do explore them!

On November 5, 2010, I opened my business, Total Engagement Consulting by Kimer, and published my first blog, “Being passionate about what I do.” I shared that I was thrilled and excited to be forming a consulting firm around diversity and career development, two of the areas I enjoyed the most during my 31 years at IBM.  My second blog was actually a copy of the press release announcing the opening of my business.

I published another blog a month later titled, “Retirement – Having the time to make an impact.” Basically I was leaving a 50-60 hour per week corporate job and then starting my own firm with the target of working 30 hours per week. That provided me the flexibility to serve on nonprofit boards and to spearhead the Kimer-Kamba Community Centre in Mtito Andei, Kenya.

In my final newsletter which I sent out earlier this month, I shared that I am basically retiring, turning over most of my business, except a very small handful of favorite clients, to Deanna Jones of “Deanna Jones Now!”

So now here are the things where I will be spending most of my time:

1) Pursuing board and advisory positions. With my vast corporate and entrepreneurial experience, the next logical step in my vocational journey is to land one or two paying corporate board or advisor positions with medium or large sized companies. I seek to leverage my extensive organizational experience and creative mind to advise companies across all areas to maximize strategic and operational effectiveness. I have a greatly enhanced LinkedIn profile (check it out) to position me for future board and advisor positions, and of course welcome any references or suggestions from all of you.

I am looking forward to supporting my work in Africa and with Other Sheep.

2) Spending more time serving the nonprofit boards I am on. One initiative I need to devote significant time on is recruiting a volunteer Global Coordinator for Other Sheep. I am the President of this nonprofit with the mission of providing resources to faith activists in second and third world countries who are working with religious leaders be more accepting of sexual minorities. Other Sheep has basically been in a holding patterns for several years after the departure of our previous executive director (we have now redefined that role as “Global Coordinator.”) Please contact me if interested and want more information.

In addition, I continue to serve on the board of “Gay Sons and Mothers” as we are finishing a short documentary on this work, and on the Planning Committee of the North Carolina Council of Churches.

3) Figure Skating! At the age of 59, I decided to pursue becoming a competitive adult figure skater, and after seven years of training and hard work have passed all the tests to now compete at the US Adult National Championships. I enjoy both the athleticism and performance aspects of figure skating, and have already won two gold and two silver medals at first first three US Adult Nationals. I want to continue to grow new skills and compete for many years to come. I have written several blogs about my skating journey and have lots of information, including my competition schedule, on my figure skating web pages.

4) Spending time with friends and family. It is nice to be able just to spend time with friends and family and take a nice 3-hour lunch with friends when I want to. Also, spending time with my 92-year-old mother who is in good health and continues to live on her own in the family home less than 2 miles from where I live.

5) And other future ventures? Of course there are still many places around the world on my bucket list that I would love to travel to, and I am strongly considering trying to get engaged in acting in community theater.

I look forward to seeing what adventures unfold in my life after work!

Getting to know a fantastic new colleague – Kristan Van Der Meer

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Kristan Van Der Meer and me enjoying a drink in the Bahamas

In early November, I went on a Caribbean cruise with about 40 colleagues associated with an Austin-based retreat center called “Sanctuary in the Woods.” My long time friend Barb Crabtree picked me up when I flew into Houston’s Hobby airport, and she had another friend with her, Kristan Van Der Meer. Kristan consults in a similar field as I (her focus is leadership and communications which admittedly includes diversity aspects) and we immediately hit if off.

Kristan is of a different generation than I, and it was great that I learned some new and cool things from her. In addition to enjoying touring, drinking and miniature golfing, we also enjoyed some professional discussions.

LESSON 1: The week of the cruise was the US Presidential Election week, so of course that was a large topic of discussion. Kristan highlighted the nuances of how men and women running for elected office are referenced – often referring to the Trump vs. Kamala race. Interestingly enough, Trump is referred to by his last name whereas Ms. Harris if often referred to as Kamala. As a sign of equity and respect, we really should be referring to Trump vs. Harris.

LESSON 2: Even as diversity and leadership practitioners, we can often use slang which has a historic background around oppression or prejudice. I shared about a time I was facilitating a training and talked about how driven I can sometimes be and that I like to “crack the whip.” As soon as the words left my mouth, I realized this could be offensive to those who dealt with a past heritage of being enslaved people.

Kristan also shared her example with me… early in her career she used the euphemism “calling a spade a spade” and then was quickly and politely educated by an African American manager. NOTE: the use of the word “spade” was starting to be used as an ethnic slur against African Americans in the late 1920s.

Kristan in her smart golfing outfit during our group’s miniature golf tournament (which Kristan and my team won!)

LESSON 3: Kristan also shared the struggles that professional women often face, especially when it comes to dress. Professional men have a wide range of latitude in dress and are not often judged on the clothing, whereas women often have to walk a narrow path between not being too feminized and appearing too masculine. She also shared that in professional outings with male colleagues on the golf course, she has to assure that her outfit was appropriately professional and sporty.

As a male ally, it is important to realize the systemic sexism that women have long had to face in the male dominated business world, and to do all I can to support respect and equity for women in the workplace.

Do check out Kristan’s website https://kvdmconsulting.com and learn more about her services.